Bailed early from work today - was feeling totally shitty by about midday…shaky, headache, stomach cramps..so pleaded unwellness and went home. Spent the better part of the day curled up on the sofa watching US talk shows on Living (emotional trash, but strangely compelling viewing). Definitely feeling better now. Back to work tomorrow..
Hellish day. Got on the bus this morning to be told by the driver that the pound coin I had for part of my bus fare was fake, and that he couldn’t give me a ticket. I didn’t have any other cash handy save for the fare, so I huffed, gritted my teeth, and said “Fine, I’ll just walk to work then!” So that got me into a great mood to start the day off.
Then I got told my staff review (which was scheduled for this Wednesday) was being brought forward to today at 2.30. I *hate* staff reviews. I’m also paranoid that they’ll tell me I’m crap, or someone else will give them feedback that they think I’m crap.
“You are the weakest link. Goodbye.”
Add the Partnership Report (yes, STILL), and I’m in a great frame of mind..
Update:
Happy now 
Review went off without a hitch, paranoia unwarranted, all is good with the working sitch. Finished with the Partnership Report (thank God!!) and it’s going live tomorrow - well, half of it anyway. So technical problems notwithstanding, I’m free of the thing!
And the allegedly fake £1 coin? It got me a can of Pepsi out of a vending machine, and 50p change. So nyer, Mr Bus Driver!
Phoned home last night to catch up on the latest. Louise, who’s bought herself a new computer, has been having loads of problems with it. Kept locking up, crashing, etc. She took it back once, and they replaced it. Same problems again, took it back again, got a new memory chip installed. Again with the problems, so she went back to the shop, and they gave her an entirely different computer. And I am *so* jealous. The original one was a Pentium III 866MHz with 128 meg RAM, 30 gig HD, DVD-ROM. The replacement (and free upgrade for the inconvenience!) is a Pentium III 1GHz with 128 meg RAM, 40 gig HD, DVD-ROM and CD-RW combined. I’m so totally pea-green! Puts my poor little Pentium 200 MMX thoroughly to shame.
Caught Pip coming out of the meeting at 2.45pm, and discovered the meeting I was supposed to have has been put back. Thankfully sloped off to lunch. Definitely needed it!
Just found the Un-telligence test at TheSpark:
Un-telligence: a measure of your ability to reason in tough situations. The higher your un-telligence, the better you are at surviving.
Personal result:
Final Score: 76% Un-telligent
“You are a smooth chick.”
You have a knack for greatness. The current average is 60%.
“The subject shows an astounding level of intelligence, and her sense of observation is one of her best qualities. Considering this, she shows a lot of potential, but that’s only part of the equation.
“Also, as much as we hate violence, an occasional mauling is one way to solve day-to-day problems like unpleasant coworkers or pesky door-to-door salesmen; she just isn’t tough enough, sir, and she avoids any solution that involves violence (not sure about that bit!)
“Finally, the subject displayed a healthy (better than most net freaks anyway) sense of humor, a down and dirty sense of morality, and a barbaric self-confidence. The balance of these three traits is important; high levels of confidence, medium levels of morality, and a good level of humor make for the strongest individuals.”
Blah…from weight off my shoulders to just blah since getting home.
I know what it is, of course. It’s my semi-regular depressing mood rearing its head again. The ‘I want, I want’ thing…like I want a job that pays more, or like I want to see the world. And I know there’s people who say things like, Well, go be proactive about it instead of moaning. It’s easy! Only, it’s not. I’d love to be in a position to drop everything, to do something for me, but I’m not. I’m too tied - financially mostly, I suppose..ok, there’s no suppose about it. But still, it would be nice to have the freedom and flexibility to backpack around the world, or get a job in another continent, or report on a TV documentary trip in the deepest Amazonian rainforests. Stuff like that.
There’s a fairly well known techie joke around that goes something like:
Q: How many Microsoft engineers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. Bill Gates just redefines DarknessTM as the new industry standard.
I’m sure that Microsoft have also defined their own concepts of time. You have normal time - 60 seconds in a minute, 60 minutes in an hour, and so forth, and then you have the Microsoft version, most commonly encountered when you try to copy large amounts of files. This happened to me this morning, when I was attempting to transfer 600 meg of files acrosss the network (not the quickest of tasks anyway).
14 minutes remaining… the computer told me at 10.11am.
17 minutes remaining… it announced 45 minutes later.
The transfer finally finished at 12.26pm. At times like that, I hate Microsoft with a passion.
I’ve always liked words, word games, etymology, and so forth. I’ve found lots of different meanings and sources for my name, from ‘light, bright, derivative of Helen’ to ‘deer, fawn’, or ‘mother of Lancelot in the Arthurian legends’ (something else I like, actually). I remember owning a mug when I was a lot younger with my name on, and a rhyme, which I’ve never forgotten, despite it being many years ago:
“You’re quick to solve puzzles without hints or clues,
And shed light on situations known to confuse,
The inner glow you have because of your name,
Makes your life a light-hearted, whimsical game,
You’ll always know happiness, love and delight,
For you follow a lifelong path, cheerful and bright.”
Also, from PressAnyKey:
The name of Elaine creates a friendly, sociable, charming nature, but causes you to be too easily influenced by others. While you find it easy to meet and mix, and can appear agreeable and compromising in conversation, you can become dogmatic and forceful if pressed too far. Others learn that you cannot be told what to do and you seldom change your mind once it is made up. You prefer situations that allow a degree of independence, but are reluctant to take on a demanding work-load or responsibility. In a position dealing with the public, you could do well because of your friendly personality, interest in people, and desire to please. When asked, you are able to give others good advice that you would probably not follow yourself, but must guard against being too opinionated in controversial matters.
I think I like that…it sounds fairly like me.
I like the results of this personality test! According to it I am a:
MASTERMIND
(Submissive Introvert Abstract Thinker)
“Like just 7% of the population you are a MASTERMIND (SIAT). You can be silent and withdrawn, but behind your reserved exterior lies an active mind that allows you to analyze situations and come up with creative, unexpected solutions.
Your sense of style and originality are your strengths, and people will respect your judgment once they get to know you. Learn to be a little more personable and you could be a great leader–you’ve definitely got the “vision” thing down. Just make sure all the plotting behind those eyes of yours is healthy.”
Yup, that’s my kind of test result 
So I’m so relieved it’s Friday - despite the fact it’s raining outside, it’s stuffy inside and I’ve a lot of work on, I’m still in good spirits because it’s the end of the week. Also helped a lot by the email I’ve just received from Dad, duplicated here.
“So Steph’s been on at me to get some exercise. Today we went for a ‘walk’, power walking she calls it. She said she knew a nice country side walk near her house. We took the dog (Molly). We walked across the fields which since she was there last had been ploughed up by tractors - mud, lots of it sticky nasty wet. It pulled my trainer off my foot and my foot then went in the mud. Steph laughed fit to bust. I was in a personal hell as we ‘walked’ for 3 miles through the muddy country side. Legs like jelly, heart rate 130-150 most of the time. Didn’t help when Steph said this was a gentle stroll for her. Dont you just hate superfit people The dog loved it covered in mud swam in the 2 lakes we passed. When we got home your mom said ‘You poor thing, you need a bath’. No, not to me, to the dog! Molly loved it…. I hated it. I’m doing it again soon….. Steph says 3 times a week. Can I come and live with you?”
I laughed fit to bust as well, joined by my workmates when I explained why I was laughing so hard!